I've suffered from headaches/migraines since I was in 2nd grade, roughly since I was about 8. They range from intense full on migraine to nuance mild throbbing. At their worst, migraines are debilitating while most headaches I can function through, though not always well.
Mayo Clinic defines headaches as throbbing anywhere in the head. It can occur on one side only, both sides, or radiate from one side to the other. They can also be sharp pains or just a dull ache.
Mayo Clinic defines migraines as intense pain in the head accompanied by nausea, vomiting, or sensitivity to light or sound.
Unfortunately, I suffer from both. I can count the number of headache-free days on one hand and that's in an entire year. In case you haven't figured it out, I have some form of headache every day, all day long.
Here are the things I have learned suffering from headaches for so long:
1. How to cope
I have had headaches for so long that for the most part I can function with most headaches. The exception is a full blown migraine. Most times, unless you are a close friend it is hard to tell I even have a headache. They tend to know only because my behavior is different during a more severe headache. As a single parent, it is not always possible to sit in a dark room with no sound or light. See, I like to have clean clothes for myself and my daughter. I also like to have a clean house (cluttered as it is right now, though I am working on that) and we both like to eat (though a full migraine means my stomach won't tolerate food well).
2. My behavior changes based on the severity of my headache.
When my headache is just a mild ache, well mild for me, I can function as a normal person. As the severity increases, I become quieter and more withdrawn. I am a talker, but during an intense headache talking hurts. During a migraine, I am lucky to be able to put sentences together. The worse the headache is the harder it is for me to handle speaking as the sound seems to echo in my already thumping head. It also affects my ability to recall words, even common words I may not be able to come up with despite having a decent vocabulary. This can be both comical and frustrating. Friends tend to notice the additional uses of thingamajig, or whatchamacallit, and understand that my head is not cooperating with communication at the moment. When it is at the worst, I can not handle communicating with anyone for more than a few minutes at a time. Oh, not to mention being known in our group as the grammar and spelling police. During a severe headache, spelling goes out the window.
3. Light and sound sensitivity sucks
Luckily, during most mild headaches I can tolerate most sounds and light. As the intensity increases, the less light and sound I can tolerate. I have taken much ribbing for watching the majority of my movies or shows (Woo hoo for subtitles on Netflix) with subtitles on. There are two reasons for this. One, I have an ADHD child who is always talking and making noise. The second is that when the headaches are bad, I can lower the volume and still understand what is going on with a show. At the worst times, like during a migraine, I tend to keep the television low if it is on at all because sometimes the light from the television can be too much. During a more intense headache, I tend to keep all the lights off until it is too dark to see inside without it, unless I am trying to get something done like dishes or cooking.
4. High pitched sounds are not tolerated well...anytime
Because of the headaches, I don't handle high pitched sounds well at all. I have had tubes put in my ears, though one has since fallen out, so this doesn't help either. High pitched sounds just go right through me worse than nails on a chalk board. It leads to me clenching my teeth and tends to make the headaches worse.
5. Irritability is real
The worse the headache, the less patience I have for anything. My friends do find this amusing as they tell me they never know what will come out of my mouth. You know that part of your brain that stops you from saying anything you think? Well, the more intense my headache the less that part of my brain works. So....if I think you did something stupid, you will know. Oh, will you know. I tend to apologize after I speak...a lot. Filterless Dani (as my friends call me) can be entertaining for others depending on who's there, but not always fun for me. I have noticed a trend though....friends tend to bring people around that have ticked them off when I have a more intense headache. It seems I have become the unofficial teller offer in my small group. Hmmm...I think they do it on purpose since it always happens when they know I have a headache.
6. Ignorance is also real
Going along with the irritability factor comes the lack of tolerance for ignorance. Now, I am not talking about someone making a mistake. We all do this. I am talking just plain ignorance, disrespect, or intentional stupidity. The more intense the headache, the less likely I will be able to hold my tongue when it comes to blatant acts of ignorance or disrespect. I guess that also goes along with the filterlessness (yes, I made that word up).
7. Most people don't understand headaches/migraines
I have had a few people try to use a headache or migraine as an excuse for their poor behavior or attitude. Yes, believe it or not someone actually tried to use this excuse to me and a friend of mine who also suffers from migraines. I will tell you what I told her. As a sufferer of migraines and headaches myself, I know the difference between a irritability due to a headache and attitude because your not getting your way. Headaches and migraines do not cause pouting or stomping off. Yes, they do cause irritability, but there is a difference. I don't know about you but when my head is hurting, I tend to avoid meeting new people or I will rub my forehead or temples to try to ease the tension. I don't sit at a table with my arms crossed and a crappy look on my face, needing to one up everyone around me. Sorry, rant done.
8. Medications are not always helpful
I have tried a number of migraine preventatives over the years and none of them have really helped. Since I've had headaches for so long, pain medication to lessen the headaches doesn't even take the edge off. Over the counter medication is useless for me. My new doctor is trying to help with this and so far he has helped to lessen the intensity of the headaches, though not take them away completely even for a day. His solution is a prescription Naproxen (Aleve basically) 500mg taken twice a day. This is 200 mg over the daily recommended dose of the Aleve available over the counter. And these babies just barely take an edge off right now, making the headaches more tolerable.
9. Outside is bad
During the more severe headaches, I feel like a hermit or a vampire. Light is bad. Light is really bad. While everyone is different and tolerates light differently during a headache, I swear that when I walk outside I am going to dissolve into dust like the vampires on Blade. Oh, Wesley Snipes plays that part well. The best way I can think to explain this is stabbing, hot poker to the eye, pain. Some people will also experience what they call sensory warning symptoms. For me, I do get those before a full blown migraine and it comes in the form of star bursts in my vision. Its like watching a miniature, or private, fireworks show in whatever room I happen to be in at the time.
10. Triggers can vary my person
Some people have headaches triggered by food items, environment, or a combination of both. The only food trigger I have tends to be artificial sweeteners. This really sucks since I am a diabetic and have to watch my sugar intake and diet soda will send me into a migraine faster than anything else. Other than that, I haven't noticed any other food affected my headaches. My headaches do tend to be affected by my stress level though. They tend to be more intense during stressful periods, though stress isn't always a guarantee.
Now, I have stated before that I am a diabetic and have explained that I do have a blood clotting disorder. These two issues tend to have headaches associated with them as well which adds to the number of headaches I have. Again, every person is different and I understand that everyone handles them in a different manner. If you suffer from headaches, I would love to hear what solutions work for you.
Danielle
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